something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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