..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize