Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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