I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize