1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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