The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
i've created a new STD.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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