Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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