Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
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there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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