Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
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you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
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And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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