Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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