and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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