Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize