Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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