Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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