I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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