come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize