i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
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