why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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