Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize