I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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