what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
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