I can't watch pbs sober anymore
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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