dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
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