Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize