actually, I'm a sock model
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
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