He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
The air was thick with penises
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
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