is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize