so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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