people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize