I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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