So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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