don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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