I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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