my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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