Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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