it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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