she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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