i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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