It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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