I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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