Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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