Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize