All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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