hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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