I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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