Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize