I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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