its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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