I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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