Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
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